Friday, August 12, 2011

She Didn't Call You Because...

Flying solo this time, I spotted the #shedidntcallbecause tag on Twitter and the rest, as they say, is history.

She Didn't Call You Because...

  • stabbed her dad.  She's out picking flowers to make herself feel better.
  •  ...Friar Laurence buried her alive, and she's got no cell reception in the tomb.
  • ...yo, seriously, her dad is crazy. Thinks he's a wizard. Said he'd chain you up and turn you into a slave if she talked to you again. 
  • ...she's washing the blood off her hands and dropped the phone in the sink.
  • wrongly accused her of getting pregnant by your best friend, and she had to go into hiding for 16 years.
  • ...she said to tell you she was going to go play with her pet snake.
  • called her a whore and broke up with her. On your wedding day. Who does that?
  • ...all you were offering was mac and cheese, and Titus invited her over for pie.
  • may have put the roofie in her drink, but she went home with some other ass.
  •'ve got a pillow over her face.


catkins said...

Hey, you've got some real talent there.
I particularly like the Othello one.

Sean O'Sullivan said...

...the woman don't want no scrubs
no more; drinking and whoring right
under her nose, with her money!
Sort it out, fatso.

Giulia said...

º She has no hands to pick up the phone. Oh, she has no tongue either.

º She hates when you try to tame her.

My contribution :D
Loved yours...

Sam said...

'you may have put the roofie in her drink, but she went home with some other ass.'

Midsummer, right?